"You can look at me like a movie star. Or you can wipe that shit out of your head and say 'Steven Seagal can save my life." Steven Seagal, in the premiere of Lawman
If you didn't catch last night's premiere of Steven Seagal: Lawman on A&E, you missed the debut of The Finest Program in the History of American Television. As you're no doubt aware by now, the star of Out For Justice, On Deadly Ground and Born to Raise Hell is a licensed Jefferson Parish sheriff's deputy, riding the mean streets of Harvey and Marrero to dispense his own brand of Jeff Parish justice:
His movies have grossed more than $2 billion worldwide. He is an expert martial artist with a 7th-degree black belt in Aikido. He's considered to be in the same class of action hero as Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger. However, Steven Seagal isn't just an action hero in the movies. For almost 20 years, Seagal has been working as a fully commissioned deputy with the Jefferson Parish Sheriff's Office in Louisiana. In addition to going out on patrol, Seagal is an expert marksman who has worked with their SWAT team and has instructed Jefferson Parish officers in firearms and hand-to-hand combat.
Steven Seagal: Lawman will allow fans to ride shotgun with Seagal as he and his hand-selected elite team of deputies respond to crimes in progress. Then, when Seagal goes off duty, the cameras will continue following him as he pursues his many ventures, including musical performances and philanthropic efforts in Jefferson Parish and New Orleans.
Let's face it, though: Watching some West Bank punk get his ass handed to him on Martin Behrman Highway by the star of Today You Die is best experienced in a group. With
hallucinogenics beer. That's why Gambit is hosting a viewing party for next week's installment of Lawman, and you're invited.
WHERE: Theo's Pizza Mid-City (4024 Canal at Carrollton)
WHEN: Wed., Dec. 9, 8:30-10 pm (show starts at 9 pm)
DETAILS: You pay for your own pizza and beer, punk. (Theo's will have a $10 bottled wine special.) A&E is sending along some Seagal-worthy swag to give away, and we'll have a Seagal-esque trivia contest for additional prizes.
Are you man (or woman) enough to come and cheer on the Seag? If you have any questions whatsoever, check out this great review from Entertainment Weekly ... or just watch this highlight reel from last night's show.
("Steven, let me drive!" "I'm just telling you where the holes are.")