Do you enjoy sneaking wine into movie theaters but find that big glass bottle to be cumbersome? Or do you appreciate a nice vino while at the mall, while walking the dog or while watching your child's Little League games but dread the judgmental stares from others? Fewer disappointed glances would come your way if you were sipping out of an abnormally large coffee cup rather than taking swigs from a bottle of merlot, right?
Now any place where drinking a Starbucks is socially acceptable you can conceivably drink a bottle of wine, thanks to some true American ingenuity. As previously reported, Starbucks now sells stomach-sized cups of iced coffee as part of a gradual transition to having intravenous caffeine systems permanently hooked to our arms. One man found another use for the Starbucks Trenta cup, besides as catalyst for a rage-fueled day fraught with frequent urination: you can fit an entire bottle of wine in one of these things.
Yes, that you can pay money to drink a wine bottle's worth of coffee is pretty horrifying, but there are many practical uses for the Trenta-turned-plastic wine bottle. Bring it with you to a Mardi Gras parade. Take it with you to a place where drinking's not allowed and tell everyone inquiring about the the deep, maroon hue of your beverage that it's some weird Indian tea Starbucks is selling. As The Hairpin points out, the straw from the cup helps avoid teeth stains and that "if you got a bendy straw you could drink it lying down." Just throw on a Snuggie, put on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and that sounds like a recipe for a great night. Who ever said Starbucks was evil?
via Laughing Squid