The plastic, fantastic Facebook star, King Cake Baby, sits down with us for an exclusive, one-on-one interview, revealing his thoughts on Mayor Landrieu and Chief Serpas’ Mardi Gras behavior press conference, non-impregnated king cakes and life as a celebrity.
1. Tell us about your wildest Mardi Gras.
My wildest Mardi Gras better always be the next Mardi Gras! But to be truthful, since my "birth" in 2010, I haven't been available to attend many Mardi Grases ... Grasis? (I'm a small plastic baby, it’s hard enough typing without having to worry about spelling as well.) Actually, I was supposed to be tagging along with a buddy last year, but I never made it out of his pants pocket. So I would call this Mardi Gras my first real one. I should be easy to spot somewhere along St. Charles Avenue.
2. How do you prepare for Carnival season?
Lots of crunches and tushy exercises. I don't know if you are aware, but I don't wear clothes. (Actually, you probably are aware of that.) So it means I'm usually mooning someone or showing off my Full Monty. I also do my best on Facebook to show off Carnival-themed photos and offer up smart-ass ideas like bacon-flavored king cake, which is the best idea ever, and if in 2013 no one is selling them, well they're Jeremy Shockey stupid.
3. Mayor Landrieu and Police Chief Serpas are cracking down on rude Mardi Gras behavior such as marking off territory on the route with sofas and putting ladders too close to the street. What advice do you have for local Mardi Gras vets who feel like they can't have fun without being obnoxious?
Obviously, I appreciate a certain level of obnoxious behavior, but I don't believe in crossing the line between what's fair and what's not. First come, first served applies, but when you start relocating furniture and putting out traffic cones you stole off Veterans Memorial Boulevard in 1998, you have to realize you are telling everyone around you that you just don't care. And that's a problem everywhere today. Too much “I” and not enough “we.” Did I just make a serious social statement? Good thing I was naked when I did so.
4. Speaking of ladders, you're a little on the short side, do you prefer watching from a ladder, someone's shoulders, or being independent and letting your cuteness earn you throws?
I'm small. You don't have to remind me! Honestly, I don't care where I watch parades from, as long as there are cameras and people looking at my diminutive self.
5. What advice do you have for Mardi Gras first-timers?
My advice to everyone is if you can't do it in your downtown, don't do it in our downtown. And eat light for a few days prior.
6. I see you’re a fan of Fleurty Girl on Facebook. Tell us, sidewalk side or neutral ground side?
Neutral ground side, of course. More revelers on that side usually! The more the better. Unless there are sofas everywhere.
7. Do you catch parades downtown or uptown?
I'll be Uptowning. And also will be at Spanish Town in Baton Rouge on Saturday.
8. Do you plan on heading to Bourbon Street to see the sights?
I like Bourbon Street because with so many tourists there, I can actually be fairly anonymous. It’s nice to not have people shouting, "Hey King Cake Baby! Where's Angelina?" I just hate that.
9. How do you feel about bakeries that leave you rattling around in the box, and not inside of the cake?
It’s not a king cake without a baby inside. Without a choking hazard, you may as well just be eating a Cinnabon.
10. What are you giving up for Lent?
For Lent, I am giving up on Lindsay Lohan. There's just no point any more. I'm also going to give up on my dream of someone making me a tiny Saints jersey. I've been dropping hints on Facebook forever, but to no avail. That's about as Lenty as I get.
11. We've seen from your Youtube pages that you travel a lot. How is that?
Well, my handler travels a lot for work, and there is a dedicated group of fans that take me on world tours - China, Rome, London. Hey, I don't need a passport. You can keep me in a carry-on. Except for the snoring, I'm the perfect traveling companion. I should probably do one of those sleep apnea studies but I never think about it when I'm talking to my doctor. But I digress. Happy Carnival!