Ten months ago, Mr. Ghetto, infamous for his "Wal-Mart" music video, released his "Jailhouse Bounce" music video, a combination if-I-ever-go-to-jail manifesto and wishlist to his lover on the outside. Today, Mr. Ghetto is being held in Orleans Parish Prison on counts of resisting arrest, battery, failure to comply and extortion by threats following a six-hour standoff.
So how's jail treating Mr. Ghetto? I'm going to guess not as well as he imagined...

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Under the cut — lyrics and images probably NSFW or the easily offended...]
"Jailhouse Bounce" begins with Mr. Ghetto and his lover in bed, pre I-might-get-locked-up-soon coitus. He asks her, "So wassup, baaaby I'm sayin' it's all love ya dig but I'm sayin' like fa real tomorrow if I get locked up, you gon' hold me down? You gon' jose (take care of, not forget about) me?" (0:07-0:08).
She willingly complies, not knowing that two days later, he'll be locked up.
This is where Mr. Ghetto's wishlist to his lover on the outside begins. Mr. Ghetto recounts the last passionate evening spent with his lover and the promise she made: "We in da bed and I'm strokin' / If I get locked up she betta jose me / She betta write and send pictures (My man locked up and I really miss him!)" (0:24-0:34).
What is Mr. Ghetto going to do with all of that spare time? Lift weights? Read the Bible? The dictionary? Nope. His manifesto begins: "Bend it over, yeah bust it open, ooh take a picture of it / Send a picture to me, bend it over, ooh bust it open huh? / So I could beat my meat! Imma jerk off...Imma beat my meat while I'm locked up!" (1:28-1:55).
But who's going to give him money for the commissary? Letters, racy pictures and masturbation are fine, but he needs money! His wishlist to his lover on the outside continues: "Send a money order, put some money on my books / I hit her with that dope dick, now I got her hooked!" (3:23-3:32).
Ah, the always optimistic and bright side-seeing Mr. Ghetto. Going to Walmart? There might be eligible bachelorettes! Going to jail? There might be a party!
Mr. Ghetto's NSFW "Jailhouse Bounce"
Fun fact: Mr. Ghetto sampled Al B. Sure's "Oooh This Love is So" (2:35-2:53).
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