
12:30 p.m. May 17 update: Michael Caine says via Twitter that the report is "completely false" and that "Everyone who has published this story has been tricked. Its completely untrue."
Purveyors of the world's finest news, The New York Post reports that inimitable (and often imitated) actor Sir Michael Caine was locked overnight in an attic while filming in New Orleans recently.
Caine reportedly took a break from filming Louis Leterrier's Now You See Me, about a crack team of bank-heisting illusionists, and fell asleep in a makeshift dressing room on location.
Clearly this could have all been avoided had he blown the bloody doors off.

Franco, who is shooting a movie here and staying on "Charters" Street, has taken to the cluttered HuffPo salt mine to write about his recent French Quarter ghost tour with "Nana (my trusty hair woman, raised in Japan) and Iris (my production consultant, raised in Mexico)." First, though, he has a note about economic development:
Our driver told us that there are more restaurants in New Orleans now than before Katrina. I don't know what that means exactly, but I guess some business is coming back.
When the tour gets to the Lalaurie Mansion, there is, of course, Nicolas Cage content:
We also visited a strange mansion that at one point was owned by Nicolas Cage. It was the site of horrific medical/carnival experiments on slaves in the vein of Human Centipede. About 200 years ago, the mansion belonged to a rich socialite with red hair. A fire broke out during one of her parties, and the fireman who answered the call discovered a chamber that smelled so bad it brought them to their knees, retching. Inside were living and dead victims of a variety of mutilations: amputations, limbs exchanged between people, sexes switched (meaning dicks were sewn onto women), skin flayed in designs to turn the victims into "human caterpillars" and other grotesque monstrosities. The house is still occupied, but it has not had a single owner for more than a five-year period.Nana was a little disappointed by the tour; she wanted more of a haunted house experience.
Confidential to Nana: There's always this, just a couple blocks away. Far, far more terrifying.
In this summer's The Campaign, Will Ferrell is Cam Brady, a shell-haired, profoundly stupid congressional candidate who must out-America his mustached opponent Marty Huggins (Zach Galifianakis). The teasers (above) preview the candidates' (fake) TV spots and respective Facebook pages: here and here. While shooting in New Orleans, its working title was Dog Fight.
The frequently terrible Jay Roach directs with a script by brilliant Eastbound & Down's writer and producer team Shawn Harwell and Chris Henchy. Saturday Night Live's Jason Sudeikis also joins the cast, with John Lithgow, Dan Aykroyd and Brian Cox. The film hits theaters August 10.

Those offerings are at best weird and useless, but today's New Orleans offer borders exploitive: Groupon wants to you to pay $149 to be an extra in a locally made zombie movie. Instead of getting paid to be in a movie, which used to be how it worked, you can pay for the privilege of smearing fake blood all over your face and standing around for several hours.
The website BeInAMovie.com offers a similar gig on Monday when it invites locals on the set of Now You See Me, a film starring Jesse Eisenberg, Woody Harrelson, Isla Fisher, Mark Ruffalo, Morgan Freeman and Michael Caine that's been filming here (hence the reason some of those celebs have been spotted around town recently, which you know if you've been following Y@ Speak).

Prediction: Breesus will put a positive, we're-ready-to-take-our-medicine spin on the bounty scandal; dismiss discussion of the franchise tag with some vague happy talk about how he can't wait to start playing again; and maybe get in a plug for Vicks VapoRub, as he did when he appeared with Leno last November.
Also on the show: Channing Tatum, who made national news this week when he told The Times-Picayune's Mike Scott he intended to open a bar in the heart of Bourbon Street and call it "Saints and Sinners." It smells like Axe body spray to me already, but what do I know; until I read that story, I thought Channing Tatum was a boxer.
And the musical guest will be Meat Loaf, so there's that as well.
WARNING: This video is DEFINITELY FUNNY AND DEFINITELY NSFW.
Petite Playboy Television (PPTV) produced this hilarious news spoof where a reporter from the ‘PigeonTown Picayune’ warns that Osama Bin Laden is not dead. After which a video of Osama ‘All About the Benjamins’ Ladin is shown, threatening consequence and repercussions for Americans celebrating his death. The consequences come in the form of excessive taxes on the goods and services coveted in the ‘hood.
“White Tees - TAAAXED!
Black and Milds - TAAAXED!
Ciroc - TAAAXED!
Remy weave Hair, Boost Mobile, Magnum condoms, Weezy Mixed tapes - TAAAAXED!”
The piece concludes with a Hollywood ending, showing smooth President Obama kicking in the door ala Biggie Smalls. The editing is flawless.
The brilliance behind this and many other youtube character sketches is a local guy from the Westbank who calls himself ‘Jack Spratt’. Spratt says he put this skit together on the fly a few weeks after the Al Queda leader was killed.
(More below the jump!)