There are portions of American cities where insufferable, Axe-Body-Spray-laden douchebags are not welcome, according to Louisiana Gov. Bobby Jindal.Read the whole thing.
The Republican railed against the existence of these so-called “no-bro zones” Thursday, claiming local government and law enforcement agencies have ceded control to roving bands of relatively tasteful citizens who shun devotees of the douchebag lifestyle.
“Right now in the United States, including here in Louisiana, there are entire neighborhoods where it’s not safe for preening young men who brag about their imported cars but only drink cheap domestic beer,” Jindal said. “That’s because the authorities in those areas have given up control to radical enforcers of decency.”
The French Quarter has become something of a Jurassic Park for Creole cuisine, a contained area in which to see shrimp rémoulade, oysters Rockefeller and other giants of a former age in all their lumbering glory. At Arnaud’s, Antoine’s, Galatoire’s and Tujague’s, evolution stops at the kitchen door.
Words Gov. Bobby Jindal uses to describe fellow Republicans in today's Politico column: navel gazing, bedwetting, needs to go to counseling.
What Jindal says fellow Republicans should do: "go kick the other guys around" and "hold fast, get smarter, get disciplined, get on offense, and put on your big boy pants."
Jindal's latest tongue-lashing at his GOP peers reminds them to hold on to their conservative values instead of broadcasting their "embarassing ... public professions of feelings of inadequacy."
"Every day it seems another jilted high-placed Republican in Washington is confessing to the voters; 'It’s not you, it’s me…'," he writes. Jindal tells Republicans to focus their attention on "painting a picture for the American public, particularly for young people, of what a free and prosperous American future will look like with smart conservative policies."
He then lists 30 reasons why Americans will "revolt" against the "nanny state" — because the "left" wants the "government to explode," doesn't care about babies, thinks rich people are evil and that people of faith are stupid.
No word on what the strategy for kicking the other guys around includes, however.
Update, 5:15 p.m.: 790 The Zone station manager apologizes to the Gleason family and announced the termination of the radio announcers.
Update, 1:25 p.m.: 790 The Zone has suspended "Mayhem In The AM" members. From station manager Rick Mack:
We deeply regret the comments made by Mayhem In The AM this morning on 790 The Zone regarding former New Orleans Saints player Steve Gleason. 790 The Zone, Lincoln Financial Media, our sponsors and partners in no way endorse or support the unfortunate and offensive commentary concerning Mr. Gleason this morning. The members of the show involved with this incident have been suspended indefinitely pending further management review of their actions.
My apologies to everyone. It was a stupid attempt at humor that backfired. Emphasis on stupid.
— Nick Cellini (@NickCellini) June 17, 2013
The New Orleans Saints literally enshrined former New Orleans Saints safety Steve Gleason for his blocked punt heard 'round the world against the Atlanta Falcons in 2006. In 2011, Gleason announced his battle with ALS, or Lou Gehrig's disease, and the forming of his Team Gleason foundation to fund research and raise awareness of the disease.
I guess Falcons fans are still bitter about a 7-year-old game. This morning, JW on TigerDroppings.com wrote that Atlanta morning zoo jockeys on 790 The Zone — the "flagship station" of the Falcons — "had a whole segment making fun of Steve Gleason and him talking through a computer."
The arse clowns from Mayhem in the AM did this 3 minute joke where they pretended that Steve Gleason called in and they asked him questions. Most of his responses were in the form of a knock knock joke and at one point he says he doesn't know if he will be alive next Thursday.
Folk singer Michelle Shocked, whose anti-gay comments at a San Francisco concert last Sunday night made worldwide headlines after fans walked out and the venue pulled the plug on her mic, will appear on an Internet radio show tomorrow morning to discuss the incident.
Shocked, a former New Orleans resident who performed at the 2011 Jazz & Heritage Festival and local venues around town (most recently a gig at Chickie Wah Wah in November), had much of her upcoming tour canceled after her remarks, which reportedly included her belief that the overturn of California's Proposition 8 (which put a ban on same-sex marriage in the state Constitution) would result in the return of Jesus Christ. (Time reported the story with the headline "Singer Who Everyone Thought Was a Lesbian Spews Anti-Gay Hate at Concert.")
Shocked, now a self-described fundamentalist Christian, has taken to Twitter to explain, somewhat, that her remarks were taken out of context and misquoted. "Am neither against a woman's right to choose nor gay marriage. Am a fundamentalist tho," she explained. "Most don't even know what my 'views on Gays' are. What is reported to be my views on Gays isn't," she added, as well as "Just my usual troublemaking, at the expense of dear friends who trust me, even when I appear to be gay-bashing."
She is scheduled to appear on The Nicole Sander Show on RadioOrNot.com Thursday morning at 10 a.m., where she'll certainly be asked about exchanges like this:
The crowd had come, presumably, to hear songs like “Come a Long Way” and “On the Greener Side,” which got airplay on MTV back in the day. (“Greener Side” was even up for a VMA against Madonna’s “Vogue.”)
Instead they were treated to a tirade that allegedly included Shocked announcing “God hates fags.”
Matt Penfield, who was live-tweeting the show from onstage called her rant, delivered during her second set, “totally sincere [and] super anti-gay and hateful.”
We’re still trying to get the full text of her speech, but apparently she told fans “you can go on twitter and say Michelle Shocked said ‘God hates fags.’”
Another Twitter user posted that Shocked “said she lives in fear that the world will be destroyed if gays are allowed to marry.”
Gov. Bobby Jindal spoke at the Conservative Political Action Committee (CPAC) annual meeting today in a speech that appears to have been a mashup of a January speech to the Republican National Committee and some of the jokes from his turn at the dais at last weekend's Gridiron Club roast in Washington, D.C.
Among the topics of Jindal's jokes: his skinny frame vs. the not-skinny frame of N.J. Gov. Chris Christie, Jindal's Indian-American heritage and waterboarding. Take it away, Atlantic Wire:
The speech delivered by the Republican Governor of Louisiana at the Conservative Political Action Committee on Friday afternoon borrowed heavily — literally paragraph by verbatim paragraph — from his January 24 speech at the Republican National Committee's winter meeting in Charlotte, where Jindal implored his colleagues to "stop being the stupid party" in a forceful speech otherwise seen as bolstering his 2016 credentials. ...
Preceding the prepared remarks, Jindal delivered a series of jokes drawing attention to his frame, his ethnicity, and the supposed racism of either political party, among other touchy subjects.
Gov. Bobby Jindal's performance at Saturday night's Gridiron Club Dinner in Washington, D.C. went over well — at least with President Barack Obama, who praised Jindal's material and delivery at the
logrolling annual chance for politicians and the D.C. press corps to share a laugh:
"I have to say, I thought Bobby (Jindal) was incredibly funny this evening. I thought he was terrific," Obama said last night at the high-profile Gridiron Dinner, in his remarks after Jindal made a highly impressive speech full of fun and jokes, wiping out his 2009 lacklustre speech which was in response to the first State of the Union Address by Obama.
Jindal's entire speech has been posted online by The Washington Post. Here's one for Louisianans:
[N]ow some people have asked me if I intend to run for President in 2016?
And the answer is that I have no plans to run. I’ve made that clear, over and over again…in Iowa…in New Hampshire…and in South Carolina.
And for those who want a local take on politicos and press rubbing elbows, tickets are now on sale for the Press Club of New Orleans' annual Gridiron Dinner, which takes place March 19 at Walk-On's. The headliner is New Orleans City Council president Stacy Head; tickets are $40 and are available here.
More Jindal under the cut. (Lots of Indian jokes!)
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Barney, Goober and Floyd the Barber all rolled into one.