OMG I JSUT DID THAT BATH SALT STUFF AND I FEEL LIKE IM GUNNA DIE. I DIDNT KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO BUT GO ON HERE ON RESEARCH IT AND SEE WHAT I COULD FIND OUT ABOUT IT. IF ANY ONNE ELSE HAS HAD REAL BAD EXPIERENCES WITH IT..? I USED TO DO COKE ALL THE TIME.. A LONG TIME AGO IN HIGHSCHOOL, im 23 now... BUT I QUIT FOR YEARS AND TODAY I HEARD ABOUT THIS LEGAL COKE. I HAVENT DONE IT IN SO LONG I GUESS I FORGOT WHAT IT FELT LIKE BUT I THOUGHT A LEGAL DRUG. HELL YEA. THE REASON I QUIT "PARTYING"(EXCEPT DRINKING ON THE WEEKENDS) is BC EVERYTHINGS ILLEGAL IN THIS COUNTY, WELL EXCEPT POT BUT U HAVE TO B SICK OR LIVE IN 3 OUT OF 50 STATES..U SEE WHAT I MEAN I CANT STOP THINKIN OR TALKIN OR FIGITING IM FREAKIN OUT SOMEONE TELL ME THAT THIS HAS HAPPENED TO THEM AND THEY LIVED TO SEE THE NEXT DAY AND WERE OK AND IT FINALLY WORE OFF. THATS THE PROBLEM I EXPECTED TO B MESSED UP BUT NOT THIS MESSED UP FOR THIS LONG. I DID A LIL BIT, I FELT IT KICK In, GOT REAL CHATTY WHENI DID IT WITH MY 2 OTHER FRIENDS AT FIRST, AND THEN THEY HAD TO GO TO WORK SO I WENT HOME W/ MY SON AND PUT HIM TO BED AND I FELT LIKE IT WAS WEARING OFF SO I RAN BACK TO THE HEADSHOP AROUND THE CORNER TO GET MORE....AND HERE I AM FREAKIN OUT. THATS PARTY OF THE PROBLEM ITS SO EASY TO GET U CAN BUY IT AT GAS STATIONS IN THE HOOD, NOT FAR FROM WHERE I LIVE...I DID A REALLY BIG LINE, LIKE A FOURTH OF THE CONTAINER AT ONCE AND I BEEN LIKE THIS FOR HOURS NOW..IT WONT GO AWAY..WONT SLOW DOWN..I FEEL LIKE I HAVE TO PUKE BUT THAT COULD B BC I HAVE A KIDNEY INFECTION RITE NOW IM ON ANTIBIOTICS FOR AND I WAS PUKIN LIKE 2 DAYS AGO FROM THE INFECTION. I DUNO Y DOIN SO MUCH I THOUGHT WAS A GOOD IDEA. THIS IS SOME POWERFUL SHIT. SO SERIOUSLY IF ANYONE IS THINKINK ABOUT TRYIN THIS FAKE BATH SALT STUFF OR FAKE COKE WHATEVER ITS CALLED I WOULDNT RECCOMEND IT. IT ALL. OR IF UR GUNNA DO IT ONLY DO ENOUGH WHERE U FEEL IT A LIL BIT. IF I COULD GO BACK IN TIME WHEN I WENT AND GRABBED MORE IW OULDNT HAVE DONE IT AT ALL OR I WOULDA DONE A LOT LESS. I FIGURED IT WAS LIKE THE REAL THING AND WORE OFF PRETTY QUICK. I WANTED TO GET HIGH REAL QUICK B4 I WENT HOME AND IVE BEEN HERE FOR 3 HOURS SITTING ON THE COMP GLUED. I CANT GET UP CUZ IM AFRIAD IM GUNNA PUKE AND MY FRIENDS ARE GONE ....AT WORK FOR A WHILE...MY MOM JUST CAME IN HERE TO TALK TO ME AND THANK GOD IVE BEEN SICK OR THEY WOULD TOTALY KNOW SUMTHIN WAS UP. SO YEA BACK TO THE SUBJECT IF UR GUNNA DO IT ONLY DO A LIL BIT!! FOR YOUR SAKE DONT DO IT IF U HAVE AN ADDICTIVE PERSONALITY LIKE ME WHO NORMALLY CANT STOP DOING SUMTHIN UNTIL SUM CATASTROPHIC EVENT STOPS ME FROM IT. LIKE MY CAR BREAKS DOWN AT WHICH POINT ILL STILL PROBOBLY B MORE WORRIED ABOUT GETTIN HIGH THEN MY CAR OR HOW IM GUNNA GET HOME. THATS UNFOURTUNETLY HOW I AM I KNOW THIS ABOUT MYSELF THATS WHY I DONT DO COKE ANYMORE CUZ ITS SO ADDICTING AND I CANT STOP. I COULDNT BEFORE. WELL IVE DONE IT A COUPLE TIMES SINCE I CONSIDER I "QUIT" AND WHAT I MEAN BY THAT ALL U AA OR NA PPL IS A RELEAPSED A COUPLE TIMES HERE OR THERE. NEVER IN A ROW THO CUZ USUALLY SUMTHIN LIKE THSI HAPPENEDS WHEN I DO IT. I FEEL LIKE SHIT AFTERWARDS, OR DURING...AND I NEED ZANEX REALLY BAD WHICH THANK GOD IM PERSCRIBED BUT I TOOK ONE .5 MILIGRAM ZANEY AND IT REALLY DIDNT HELP. IM JUST AFRIAD TO TAKE ANYMORE BC THIS KID I KNOW OF, JUST DIED FROM WHAT EVERYONE THINKGS IS STILL BATH SALT STUFF AND PROBOBLY SOME DOWNER BC IF HE FELT LIKE I FEEL RITE NOW I WOULD TOTALLY AND IAM TOTALLY FREEAKIN OUT AND WANT IT TO STOP AND IF I WAS A LIL MORE FUCKED UP AND DID DO A LIL REASERCH ON IT I WOULD DO PROBOBLY HEROIN TO CALM DOWN AT THIS POINT. WHICH IVE DONE A COUPLE TIMES SO I GUESS THATS NOT SO FAR OUT THERE BUT I DONT GO OUT OF MY WAY TO GET IT ON A EVERY DAY BASIS. MY PROBELM IS PILLS. WHO DOESNT HAVE THE PROBLEM THATS 23 ANYMORE?? SO MANY PPL ARE DYING OR JUST POPPIN PILLS AND THATS WHAT I GUESS I BEEN DOIN FOR A COUPLE YEARS NOW..IT ALL STARTED WHEN I WAS WITH THIS KID NAMED BOBBY FROM CLEVE AND WE HAD A 1 YEAR OLD TOGETHER ...ONE DAY I CAME HOME FROM WORK, WHICH IS ALL I DID BACK THEN WAS WORK AT THIS PLACE CALLED ANGELOS..IF ANYONE SEES THIS I KNO..U PROBOBLY ALREADY KNOW ITS ME AND ILL B GETTIN A TEXT SOON..OR A MESSAGE ON FB. NEWAYS...I CAME HOME FROM WORK AND HES SITTING AT THE KITCHEN TABLE WITH A FRIEND OF OURS (sHAWN) AND SAYS "i ALREADY DID IT SO U CANT SAY NO" AND IM LIKE WHAT R u talking about (ok im takin the caps off bc i feel like since ive sat here for 3 hours typing this -takin breaks to text all my friends and tell them not to ever do this and texting the ones i did it with to see if their freakin out too which their not cuz they didnt do as much as i did) that ive calmed down a litlle.im like stuck at thsi computer until im done. my mom put my son to bed and in the abth and ive been sitting here the whole time. thankgod for family who puts up with crazy me.. i wonder if neone will ever read this far..?? wel if u did get this far e-mail me at email@example.com... tell me ur experiences w/ that bath salt stuff, or w/ nething else. or even if u have a question about nedrug except peyote ive prollly done it atleast once, and will give u sum feedback on it and what it makes u feel like, ur first time...if ur thnkin of experiementing im the one to cal. ive done it all over the years. im only 23 but i started partin when i was really young like 13 or 14 and i dont just mean smokin weed and drinkin i mean doin hard drugs at a lreally young age. it drove me out of the house at 16 bc my parents couldnt deal with me acting out. theyd ground me id sneak out the window. even from a 2 story house (my bedroom) bein on the 2nd floor. Id jump out of window at nite while my parents were downstairs thinkin im asleep and go tot he park and get highusuallyl on weed but eventually it became bigger and better things. the first hard drug and when i say that i mean hard as in crack/ coke, heroin, meth, stuff like that. pretty much nething besides weed and alcohhal... was coke. i did it with this girl caley at a party prolly in amherst, ohio..i was there with my cousin who would kill me if she ever found out i was usin coke, which she ended up finding out..i never understoof it...my mom always thought my cuz was a bad influence cuz she was older but in all reality she was a good one. besides the partys we had and concerts we went to...i got ashlee to start smokin weed. the first time she ever did it was with me so if anyone was the bad influence it was me..then when she atarted smokin everyday like i did she was sick for like a year..still to this day i think shes allergic to weed..but i kno ic ant tay on track with a story but thats the point of me writin this so u can try to be in the midn of someone whos on this crap so mayb u wont do it or do as mushc. im really hopping that everyting im sayin is commin out rite and is tyyped correctly bc im a secretary and i have perfect grammer but i literally cannot see the computer screen nemore. i took 2 5 ML zanex since ive been on here writing this ginormious blog..and i really hope this isnt my last letter i ever write..and the first acutlaly..i guess im writing this bc im fed up with getting up just to get high everyday..im sick of the pills, i hate myself for doin it then bein streessed cuz i have no money.. and i have a son to take care off on my own..which is my excuse why i could never quit the opiates ice been on and off of for about 2 years now. i did em everyday for about a year, then one day i was in a hurry and didnt do what i normally did and i got to work and had to drive rite back home to get sumthin bc i was sooo cold and hot and sweaty at the same time, i was achy *like i am now( and felt nausous and like i had to poop. For ppl that kno me this doesnt seem to out of the ordinary bc of who i am and how much of everything ive done. Its no suprise to a lot of my friends that my kidneys failling rite now ..bc everything u do has a conswquence...i nevver think about that consuence until the deeds already done. i overdosed twice but only went to the hospital for once of those times. i have no stomach lining in my stomach bc when i was 12 i found out my lil bro has brian cacer, my mom and dad flipped. split up and became alcoahlics, my mom started sleepin with the dude who lived above us in this apt on our house and at nite i would hear her upstairs fuckin him while my dad was at work..i never told him this i just assuumed it prolly wouldnt do any good tellin him, just cause more fights which i hated to watch as a kid. i always felt like the peer mediator..i think all these things have contrubyted to my hardcore drug use...bc i went to the psych ward obvisouly the first time i tried to kil myself, well that was the only time i intentionally did it.
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