Silent Scream
TV-land's appetite for exes depends on public amnesia, not forgiveness. Most people just can't remember what all these "formers" did, and many of them are too obscure to even try to recall. TV mishmashes history: it's like that game of "funny faces" in which you can mix and match, and switch their voice boxes. All these ex-perts sound alike because, no matter what their area of expertise, it's been through the TV blender and came out smooth.
The viewership of expert funny faces has been dropping precipitously for another reason: all these "formers" are old. Seeing so many old heads on TV is like watching a mass-resurrection, a return of zombies. It's a scary movie that must have everyone under 50 clutching at their nearest in terror. What if these "formers" actually did come back, in real life, not on TV? Perish the thought. Silent scream.
TV shows no signs of slowing down the rising from the graves. On the contrary, truly former formers are being drafted from the very shadows of Hades. A new show on Pox called The Dead Speak Out, debuting next week, features Nixon and Joseph McCarthy on the subject of Homeland Security and Lyndon Johnson on war strategy. There is no end to how deep TV can reach for formers. Me, I'm waiting for Plato to say something about the caves at Tora Bora.
