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Wednesday, February 11, 2015

A very specific list of what you can't bring to Mardi Gras parades

Posted By on Wed, Feb 11, 2015 at 3:00 PM

click to enlarge Parade ladders in 2009. Parade ladders should now be at least six feet from the curb. - RAY DEVLIN/FLICKR
  • RAY DEVLIN/FLICKR
  • Parade ladders in 2009. Parade ladders should now be at least six feet from the curb.

You're probably looking at your chaise lounge and pet iguana like, "Yeah, I can't wait for the big day, when those parades are a'rolling and I'm looking like a king on my Crate & Barrel cushions with my reptile friend." Or maybe you're loading up your float with sacks full of treats, like rosaries and plastic bags of beta fish. Sorry, friends, you'll have to leave your religious gear and reptile and marine life at home.

The New Orleans Police Department's 5th District reminds Mardi Gras revelers what to leave at home before hitting the parade route.
Open containers of glass or metal are NOT permitted along the parade route.
Glass and crowds don't mix. Your Campbell's chicken and dumplings stays in the pantry, too.
The fencing or roping off of public property is prohibited without prior consent of Parks and Parkway Commission
Don't join the Krewe of Chad. Parades are for everyone, despite whatever the Beer Pong & "But This Area Is For Our Family" Auxiliary may tell you.
If using ladders, do not fasten together in pairs or groups. The ladders shall be SIX feet from the street curb
The six-feet rule is relatively new but long overdue. Don't block the frontline.
No ladders, ice chests, erected structures, chairs, chaise lounges, barbecue grills or etc. shall be placed in intersections or between curbs.
No sofas or chaise lounges are allowed along the parade route.
The two separate mentions of chaise lounges means chaise lounges are a problem. Get your chaise lounges out of there, Chad's Parents.
No reptiles are permitted on the parade route two (2) hours before or after a parade nor within 200 feet of the parade.
Clearly this rule was written for the one guy who absolutely refuses to leave his turtle at home. 
No dog [sic] are allowed within 200 feet of any parade route one hour before, during or one hour after a parade.
No dog allowed. Leave dog home.

As for the float riders, you cannot throw "any life threatening objects; noxious substances or liquids; objects with sharp points; insect, marine life or animals; discount coupons or redeemable throws; political or religious messages; condoms or sexually oriented devices; discarded cardboard boxes and items with commercial advertising."

Note: I definitely have received free Wendy's Frosty vouchers from Slidell parades.

"HAVE A SAFE AND ENJOYFUL MARDI GRAS" (emphasis NOPD's)

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